My husband is in another country and hasn't seen me in five and a half months. Today he is going to spend the day in a hotel, relaxing with two of his shipmates- one of whom is female. Do I trust him? Most days I would say without a doubt. Today it's getting to me.
This girl in particular bothers me. I have met her and she seemed nice. Concern lies with a story my husband told me. She cheated on her fiance with another shipmate (whom was married). Not such a surprising story given distance and the environment our military are in day in and day out. A bit sad maybe, but not surprising.
Now the situation is potentially in my court. I met my husband a decade ago, dated him, and he cheated on me. I stopped talking to him for a few years, he looked me up one day & we became friends. For three years he built trust back up with me. He was ready to give up on us getting back together again when I finally decided I can trust him. We dated a year before we were married.
Is it a fact history will always repeat itself? Has he truly learned from his past mistakes to know what the consequences of 1 night of "fun" will be? I hope so.
Regardless of what will happen, I would still do it all over again if given the chance. Loving him, even if only for a while, has been a great gift. It's allowed me to love myself a little more. For someone who's far too hard on herself that's a big deal. The best of all, for a few years of my life I've lived without the loneliness that's haunted me since I was a child. That is definitely worth it.
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